Why my husband and I are saying good riddance to Valentine’s Day. We, as a couple, have decided after our almost 12 years together that Valentine’s Day, as whole is just not needed. Sure, we will continue to do small things for our children, but as a couple no.
My husband said the other day ” Do we really need Valentine’s day as a day of love for one another. I mean isn’t that what anniversaries are for?” I smiled and you know what I have to agree. Especially as we near our 12 year mark as a couple, and three years married to one another, it makes sense, in all the right ways.
We generally use our anniversary, to either spend it together, with a family vacation, or we take the time to have a date trip with one another. Valentine’s in general has never been one of my favorite holidays, there is so much pressure to outdo others to show people that you love them. While I am a bit of a “romantic” I am not an over the top romantic at all. I would much rather have a just because gift, a small gift like one flower or even a candy bar. I know so simple right? I am easy to please in that respect, and so is my husband. Now, this is not to say we have not attempted to do grand gestures for one another, we have… but it always leaves us feeling a bit stressed out and sometimes overwhelmed. There should never be a holiday that makes you feel this way about your relationship!
With all the pressure that social media can put on an average relationship I think that others should also consider saying goodbye, to a “traditional” Valentine’s Day. There should never be any sort of outside pressure placed on your relationship, especially if you want to have a successful & healthy one. You should never feel like you have to have the better present, presentation, or partner than someone else. This is not a competition people. Every relationship is different, every person has their own needs and wants. For us specifically, we neither want or need to continue with something that has become just a social media & consumer holiday.
Like I stated above we will continue to do small things for our children, and by small, I mean like small tokens of love, to show them they are very much loved by both of us. The tokens usually are a small figurine or stuffed animal and some candy. Each gift is specifically geared to each one of them. By doing this, like we have every other Valentine’s day for them, we teach them that it isn’t always about who gets the most or the best presents, it is more about putting thought and effort into knowing and loving each one of them for who they really are.
As they get older, they too are seeing there isn’t always a need for this specific holiday, that you can show someone you love them all year long. It isn’t always about who can outdo the other, but more about the person and who they are. Keep it simple. Keep it meaningful. Keep it about the person you love and never worry about others around you.
So what exactly will be our plans on Valentine’s day you may ask? Well, keeping it simple, we will order the heart shaped pizzas we do every year, give our kids their few small gifts, and then as we do everyday, give each other a kiss, saying I love you. Short sweet and simple! No need for flowers, balloons, huge tokens of affection, or any feeling that we have to outdo other couples.
Tell me what your plans are for Valentines Day, are you a grand planner or are you a non-traditionalist like we are? I would love to hear from you.
Until Next Time,