How Does A Deist Find Comfort?

Over the past couple of months, my family and I have faced some rather hard times and issues. I am sure that many of you wonder how exactly do I cope or find comfort. It is often hard for those who were brought up in the Christian faith to understand a Deist’s way of thinking. Which, is perfectly okay, many people can have different ways of looking at things and understanding them.

Deism, is not a religion per say, but a way of understanding things through reason. What does this mean exactly? Well, its rather simple actually. A Deist looks at all possible outcomes, both positive and negative and then through reason comes to the best informed choice for themselves.

Now, how does this apply to comfort and coping in one’s daily life? A Christian will often turn to prayer in their religion, asking God for help and guidance through hard times. A Deist, on the other hand, will look at the situation and determine what they can do to make it better.

This is not to say that one is right, and the other is wrong in doing so. Everyone handles things differently in their lives, with their beliefs and with their morals. It is up to the individual to decide what works best for them.

Does a Deist Pray?

Does a Deist pray at all? Well yes, but not as a Christian would. The deist believes that we should not ask the divine creator for things, that we should provide for ourselves and make do in our lives with our God-given reason.

In the event that a Deist prays it is usually to give thanks for what they have experienced in life, to be thankful for their existence, and thankful for the knowledge they were blessed with.

A Deist knows that not everything in life is easy, simple, or “blessed”. That we are all faced with hardships that appear in our lifetimes. Most Deists in turn are realists by nature. Which in turn can make them seem cynical in nature to others around them.

This is not necessarily true. A deist knows that bad things to occur in life, tragedy is a part of life, just as death is. There is nothing that can be done to change certain things that happen. But what we do know and we find comfort in, is how we handle ourselves and our lives in the face of these circumstances.

You can choose to have a positive outlook in life even being a Deist and a realist. You choices and your outlook are dependant on who you are as a person. If you are a negative person by nature, of course your outlook will be skewed to look for all the negatives in a situation. If you are a realist, much like being a Deist by faith you tend to look at both sides to see what the true outcome will be.

Are Deists Spiritual in nature?

Being a Deist does not mean one is not a spiritual person, or that the person lacks faith. I cannot stress this point enough. A Deist does not believe in “Revealed Religion”

re·vealed re·li·gion

religion based on divine revelation rather than reason.

Because of this people will often see you as, outside the norm with your beliefs, just as they look at those of Pagan, Norse, Wiccan, or other “Religions” outside the Christian belief as being wrong.

I urge you to consider this though, how are we to know what is the wrong way to believe something?

Revealed religions teach that their beliefs are the correct ones, the only ones, the “Right” ones to follow. That all other beliefs and or religions outside of them are incorrect in their teachings and or followings.

A Deist, instead of telling you, your beliefs are wrong, will challenge you to a different way of thinking. They will often pose questions to you and look forward to hearing why you believe the way you do.

Some Deists, however, are very passionate about why they believe what they do and will turn a friendly conversation into a rather heated debate. But that is all it is, a debate on facts and on opinions formed by one individual.

Parenting as a Deist

What do I teach my children about religion? I am sure a lot of you have wondered about that as well.

I brought my children up in a Christian background, we went to church for many years. They were baptised into the Christian faith when I worked as a Childcare Coordinator at a church. They had a solid foundation in the church for 7 years.

Now, as we have moved away from organised religions/revealed religions, I encourage them often to ask questions. Question everything and anything that they may want to. To form their own beliefs and ideas, it is not for me to force my belief system on anyone, this includes my own children.

I teach them strong morals, to use their hearts as well as their minds, when they make a decision about something. They should make well formed opinions about things before they jump into something. This is a learning process, I assure you.

Just as every parent and child learn as they grow together through faith and life, our journey is no different from many others around us.

I teach them to find comfort in themselves, in those around them who love them, to find comfort in making rational formed decisions rather than impulsive rash ones.

Dealing with judgement from others

As I have stated above, as a Deist, there is a certain amount of judgment that befalls us for believing something outside of the “societal norm”. But what is normal really?

I have learned to be at peace with my decision in being a Deist, I have found more peace and self awareness/comfort in my own life once I made the decision to identify myself as such.

Whenever someone says they will pray for me, for the most part I thank them and go about my own way. However, there are sometimes when it is a forceful prayer, or a forceful I wish you would do this as I do, kind of thing. When this happens, I smile and often become silent.

I do not want you to feel as though you have to force prayer on me or your beliefs. As I am not being forceful with mine on you. I will respect your faith, your wishes, and your life. Please do the same for me, that is all I ask.

What brings the most peace?

I am sure this is different for everyone, Deist or not. But, for me, I am most at peace, when I am outside listening to nature around me. Being at home and cooking for my family, simply enjoying our time together. Listening to music on a long drive to nowhere in particular, with the windows down and watching creation pass me by, as though it were a moving work of art.

All of these things bring me peace, they bring me comfort, and they are simplistic in nature but joyous all at the same time.

Take a few moments an reflect about what truly gives you peace and comfort. Is it so different from what I believe? Are we really so drastically and morally different in our construction? Do you have something that comforts you that you wish to share with me?

Send me a message on the blog or on facebook, I am always up for conversation and to hear your stories.

Until Next time


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